Success or Sorrow?


Over the last couple of years I've noticed more (now that I am an entrepreneur) that many people seem to be drawn to a particular model or definition of success. There seems to be confusion over what is actually meant by success often causing what appears to be much sorrow.

15 July 2020

 

So let us first of all look at the definition of success.

The Oxford English Dictionary defines success as the accomplishment of an aim or purpose; alternatively it also states it as the attainment of fame, wealth or social status. The origin of the word comes from the mid-16th century. It comes from the Latin word successus (verb succedure) to ‘come close after’. It was used to describe the line of succession of monarchs and nobility. 

The two elements of the definition of success could easily confuse and cause issues with focus. If one particular mindset sees success as an accomplishment of an aim or purpose - that seems pretty harmless. However, if somebody takes success as attainment of wealth or social status this could put a lot of pressure on an individual to achieve this. Social media and the likes of Kim Kardashian show people their definition of success by touring their huge houses, no apparent financial considerations, immaculate beauty and a life that is open to all. Surely, this is enough to put many behind a rock to peek or to push themselves out there no matter the cost.

The cost of putting one’s life out there and going with what is seen as the mainstream definition at the time appears to have caused issues within society. People of all generations are now keen to show others that they have succeeded in one way or another via social media or face to face meetings …happy families, business empires, cute puppies and amazing smoothies. The list is endless. What lies behind the smartphone or person maybe a different story. Our desire to look successful comes at price. We are regularly lying to ourselves about one’s truth and real purpose; to the detriment of happiness and a feeling of fulfillment. 

What am trying to say?

If you are finding that you are being drawn into a world where the definition of success is getting you stressed….get out and re-assess….it may not be for you. This is no reflection on your abilities or your personality. It may not be for you or not the time. Accept it, learn from it and seek other more fulfilling opportunities that may give you that feeling of success in something unexpected and different…

So how can you manage these situations…here are some ideas:

  • Remember life changes all the time so this means definitions and attitudes change too. Choose your battles - so the saying goes. 
  • The other aspect to consider is questioning the effect it has on you. “Is this situation healthy for me?” Creating a habit of questioning yourself can lead to self awareness and quite possibly solutions for ideas you had never thought of before!
  • Become proactive in your reaction to stress. Respond to every new stress as though you have never come across it before. Your wonderful imagination and your growing self awareness will help you grow your self confidence to deal with every situation differently. 
  • Be honest with what you define as success - create a mind map with some positive affirmation attached to each point. Review it regularly to keep you focused on your definition of success.

Try these out bit by bit and if you feel inspired write your experiences down and share them with others. 

Good Luck!

Go forth and find your success with happiness and truth.

 

Success or Sorrow? was published by Bedfordshire Lymphoedema on July 15, 2020

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